It's Really Luck!!!

I wish I had voiced out my preferences when I was given a chance then. I gave it up and now I am in such deep s***.

That day I left my handphone on the desk, and left office to go for my Japanese class. On my way, I then realised I forgot my handphone. I called back using the phone of my colleague. My boss picked up. I told her that I think I left my phone in office. Guess what she said?!?! She questioned me in an impatient tone, "So what do you want me to do?"

I am sure if the same thing happen to you, you won't expect me to say that in your face. I don't see what's the big deal for you to get so frustrated.

The next day you can even treat it as nothing has happened. You didn't even bother telling me that my other colleague has safekept for me.

That same day that I got back to office. I was even more angry that you can make everything seems my fault AGAIN. Not once, not twice, but it's the million times you did that again.

You did a deal in the morning without telling me. You expect me to decipher that "please help me print another copy and i'm going to bring it to the customer" as "i'm going to get the documents today, as we've done the deal today". I am not as SMART as you to know that the two sentences are synonymous. And you could have obtained the papers earlier so that you can do the deal anytime.

Now you make it that nobody likes to talk to you. I have to be the bad guy and I've to stand your scolding because I've no idea what you've done. The more I don't understand why you need to make 3 calls and still come back office to scold me AGAIN. You only know how to put the blame on others. No wonder nobody likes to talk to you.

I have to act happy during the evening while we having our team dinner. You would never have know how upset you've made me. But because of you, I got the motivation to finish editing my resume over the weekend. No matter how bad the market is, I know I won't be able to tolerate you for any longer.

I can never be as "ATAS" as you. I can't buy LV and still complain that Kate Spade can't never compare to the LV bags. I can't drink Starbucks everyday like you do. At least I know my money is well-spent on trips, that I can enhance my knowledge in the long run. How would buying an LV or Kate Spade makes you any smarter?!?!

P.S. Sorry to those who are LV or Kate Spade fans but I really don't see how it makes you look smarter.

Truth of Life

Golden advice from a buddy:

"Life is like a stage play, stage play is like life, just that sometimes in life, there isn't 'Take 2'."

Harsh Environment

Perhaps my last blog entries may sound scary - 'friend is foe & foe is friend".

Once you acknowledged a group of people into your "circle", you are considered "ONE OF THEM". Be it good or bad. You seem to be labeled just because of the group you are in. Is that BRANDING? Does an opinion of a person be seen as the opinion of another?

Someone once told me that isn't it good to find your own "clique". Perhaps one or two people, or a group of them who share common beliefs and thinking.

Well, I guess it depends on how you think it. To some, they see it as a good thing; to others, they might look it in a bad way. To many people, they simply love to classify things, and people. They like to generalise everything they see, touch, smell, taste and hear. GENERALISATION.

Trouble Times

The market has been so volatile these days. Everything is the same kind of news regarding the market. The fall of Lehman Brothers. The merger & acquisitions going around in the U.S. The bailouts coming from the Central Banks in Europe & U.S. It's a domino effect. When would this be the end?

No matter how much actions going around me, work is still pretty much the same for me. Sometimes I feel that I am getting so used to all the nonsense at work. At times I am really pissed off by the comments and actions of people.

Perhaps I am not an easy-going person to get along afterall. I don't like the feeling of not knowing who are your foe and friend a work. Life is indeed better when you're a student. No politics. You don't have to learn how to grow up at the harsher environment. Now things haven't changed much, but inside me I think I've adapted to accept that the world around me now is like this. A place where your enemy is your closest friend. Make your friends close, but make your enemies closer. That's just the way life is.

Almost 2 months...

It's almost 2 months since I last updated this blog. I guess those friends of mine who used to frequent this blog would have forgotten that this blog still exists.

Many things have happened over the 2 months. My eventful trip to NYC & Toronto. A job interview that offered an opportunity that I had hope for 5 years ago. Perhaps if it's not yours, it's not yours. I must learn to face reality. I must appreciate what my capabilities are and are not.

I certainly wish to get out from where I am now in less than a year's time. I really can't stand Ms. J. She's pissing me off at times. She never listens. And because she doesn't listen, she claims that you didn't tell her beforrehand. She put blames on you intentionally, making you feel bad. Perhaps I don't have her "common sense" but I think she ought to give people some respect. Not only does she not praise you when you do well, she makes sure you remember her scolding. I really don't think I can tolerate her for too long. That's the main reason why I am planning to leave.

Of course, the other reason is I don't know if where I am now is where I belong. i don't feel a sense of belongings here. Perhaps I don't think I have the capabilities required in this role.

Well, time for a chance soon!!! Counting down to Dec first if I survive all these crap!!!

Trip To NYC & Toronto

I really can't wait to head to NYC and Toronto!!!

It's been such crazy weeks. I am rushing to finish up reports to the "internal customers" so as to provide the facilities for my "external customers". I have no idea how I am supposed to finish in time.

Now I really wish August would come soon. I need a break to rest my minds and enjoy myself. My last overseas trip was in late Jan (if you discount the frequent trips to JB in Jun). I think it's time for me to recharge my whole body...

The Unknown Ahead

I have been so shagged these days after work that I rarely come online. I normally go straight to bed after only some TV shows. I also never head out after work these days. Honestly, I have no idea why I am so tired.

Recently, I also been thinking whether I've chosen the right career path. Studying part-time is ok. However, I am certainly not those very academic kind to do research at university. Nor am I super ambitious. I am not a born leader. Yet, at times we have to choose what's best for us and what we are good at. I am once again at a crossroads if I am suitable for my current role. Or should I go into a position that allows me the chance to travel or some jobs that do not require to reach sales quota?

There was an opportunity of job transfer to the research department. I couldn't leave my job as of now. I am not sure if I have made the right decision. I probably won't know till few years from now...